Why am I so tired all the time now? Am I feeling low because I am drained and tired or am I drained and tired because I am feeling low? Problem when I am feeling down is that I want David to come back, to apologize, to beg forgiveness, and to ask to be taken back. I want to understand why he has done this to me and what he is getting out of it. Not going to happen! I fully understand -- but still -- it is what I want -- especially when I am feeling down.
On the advice of my new acquaintance Cyndee I joined POF.com. POF stands for "plenty of fish". It is a free dating service that allows you to send email to other singles without paying for membership. Of course, because this site is single it attracts all sorts who don't want to pay, and those like me who are just getting our toes wet. Cyndee said that this is practice before joining J-date or Match.com. So I have sent out a number of email; gotten some responses, and having a pretty non descript back and forth about museums with someone in Morristown who contacted me first. Let's see if he asks me out for coffee or drinks or just wants to continue emailing -- eventually I'll get bored.
Nice to have someone show the tiniest bit of an interest; but don't like negative email. Got an email response from someone yesterday asking me if I had decided to change both outside and inside in July. He saw a photo from July of me with dark hair and a photo from August of me with much shorter and streaked hair. And since I said I was recently separated, this guy assumed that I dumped David after 42 years (inside change) and got my hair done (outside change). Said that he assumed that if one was married for 42 years then the marriage would last forever. I wrote back that I had made the same assumption and that I was not the one doing the dumping. I asked him what his story was, but haven't heard back -- it's okay if I never do hear back. A bit more judgmental than I want at the moment.
Wednesdays are turning into my craziest day of the week. Get up and take care of dogs; volunteer courier at Morristown Memorial from 9-1; go home and take care of dogs; get Natalie at school around 2:35 or 3:45 (depending if she has an after school activity); take Natalie to swimming from 4:30-5:00; meet Dan somewhere for dinner; and then NCJW's Group Peer Therapy about Women Coping with Divorce and Separation from 7:30-9:00. Any wonder that I am tired?
No comments:
Post a Comment